When Kids Want to Fight
• • • • • Parenting Tip August 23, 2013 When Kids Want to Fight When children are unhappy they look for ways to draw their parents into a fight. Kids know just where your buttons are and how to push them to make you angry. “Dad wouldn’t do it that way,” or “You never let me have fun,” might be all that’s needed to create the volcano effect. When children get angry and are looking for a fight, it’s…
The Unmotivated Child
• • • • • Parenting Tip August 20, 2013 The Unmotivated Child Unmotivated children are generally passive, cooperative, flexible, easygoing, and accommodating. These children may be easier to get along with because they lack the drive of strong-willed kids, but parents also struggle with these children at times. They may not have the fortitude to stand up for themselves, withstand temptation, or push hard to complete a task. They’re sometimes people-pleasers and may be easily directed in positive or…
Eureka!
Recognizing a eureka moment isn’t that difficult. Responding to it is another story. In my case, it seems I have a slow learning curve. Our annual college retreat has injured my body in some way or another: broken rib, sprained ankle, and whiplash to name the biggest. Notice how I blame it all on the retreat? This year, the retreat did it again. I was being pulled behind a boat on a tube, in very rough water, and as we…
Teaching Children to Wait
• • • • • Parenting Tip August 14, 2013 Teaching Children to Wait Patience is a virtue but few preschoolers understand what that means. Young children want it now and resort to all kinds of attention-getting tactics to get it. Badgering is that tenacious way children ask the same question over and over again. And then there’s the whining. It can drive even the most healthy person crazy. Children need to learn how to wait for things. It’s a…
Retraining the Heart
• • • • • Parenting Tip August 9, 2013 Retraining the Heart It’s amazing how transparent children can be when you take time to actively hear what they have to say. After listening for a while, it’s often possible to identify some key thinking errors that perpetuate the child’s problems. Take some time to study your children. What weaknesses do they have? What lies do they believe? What are some of the unproductive things they’re saying in their hearts?…
Parenting Insight You Can Use Now
Parenting Insight You Can Use Now Developing internal motivation in children is one of the fast tracks to help them toward maturity. Unfortunately, too often parents use external motivators to get their kids to move forward. “If you get your homework done then you can go out and play.” “If you clean your room then you can have some computer time.” This approach basically says, “If you do what I say, I’ll give you what you want.” Children trained this…
Referencing the Normal
“How do you stop a rhinoceros from charging? You take away his credit cards.” It’s a joke, but it only makes sense if you have knowledge of the words being used. If you had no reference to rhino’s or credit cards, the joke would fall flat. Consider repeating the same joke to teenagers of today. Their response? “You unplug it.” For those of us back in the day, that would have fallen flat because our reference to plugs was to…
Muscle and a Shovel
Have you heard of the book, Muscle and a Shovel by Michael shank? That’s a question that was asked at our Houston-area preachers’ luncheon last month by one of our members. Interestingly, not one of the preachers there had heard of the book. The questioner told the story of getting a phone call from a lady who wanted him to baptize her and her husband. When he asked to study with them as a prelude to the baptism, she replied,…
5 Youth Culture Trends
1. Social Media Narcissm 2. Relativism 3. Cohabitation 4. Tolerance 5. Marketing & Consumerism For better understanding of the youth culture, and resources, check CPYU
Be Careful with Triangles
• • • • • Parenting Tip July 25, 2013 Be Careful with Triangles Triangles in relationships happen often in family life. Conflict between two people can become an invitation for another person to join in. If parents aren’t careful, and create triangles inappropriately, people get hurt. But if triangles are used properly, they become great opportunities for healing and learning. Here are some examples to watch out for: • A child who is unhappy with Dad’s discipline may go…