But My Anger is Justified
• • • • • Parenting Tip February 18, 2013 “But My Anger is Justified” Some view their anger as justified because they are right and others are wrong. They believe that being right is the only ticket required to launch into an adult temper tantrum. But saying “He made me angry” implies that external events require emotional intensity. The dad who links the trigger (what “made” him angry) and response (what he does with his anger) too closely ends…
Understanding Anger’s Five Causes
• • • • • Parenting Tip February 13, 2013 Understanding Anger’s Five Causes Some parents have a hard time analyzing their anger to get anything positive out of it. A helpful way to uncover what’s behind your anger is to recognize anger’s five basic causes. These five causes overlap at points and you may find that the situation you’re experiencing fits more than one, but this list is often helpful to bring some rationale to feelings. Use these causes…
Learn to Recognize Emotional Signals
Parenting Tip February 9, 2013 Learn to Recognize Emotional Signals The subtle emotional signals you experience many times a day can help you know when and how to discipline your children. This takes some work and you may need to spend time educating yourself on the emotional signals you’re already receiving. Imagine a car’s control panel with many little lights. They flash occasionally, sometimes even intensely. With experience you begin to learn about all those lights and what they mean.…
Teaching Honor In The Bathroom
• • • • • Parenting Tip January 28, 2013 Teaching Honor In The Bathroom The bathroom is an excellent place to work on honor. In part, honor means that people do more than what’s expected. They look for things that need to be done and do them without being asked. For a while, my (Scott) family had a sign by the light switch in our bathroom that read, “Is the bathroom ready for the next person?” All we…
Overcoming Selfishness With Honor
• • • • • Parenting Tip January 19, 2013 Overcoming Selfishness With Honor Some parents are frustrated because their children are so self-focused that they can’t seem to grasp the concept of honoring others. How can you help children think about other people instead of always thinking about themselves? One helpful way is to teach kids to recognize emotions in others and then know how to respond accordingly. One dad wanted to work on honor with his…
What is Your Action Point?
• • • • • Parenting Tip January 15, 2013 What is Your Action Point? Why is it that Dad can get the kids in bed faster than Mom? Or, Why do children respond differently in the classroom, on the playground, and in the home? The answer to these questions has to do with a number of factors but one piece of the puzzle is what we call an action point. An action point reveals the cues that…
Compliance versus Obedience
• • • • • Parenting Tip January 12, 2013 Compliance versus Obedience Some parents say, “I can usually get my children to do what I say eventually.” Parents sometimes think that obedience is the same as compliance. When you say to your son, “Please leave the computer and help me bring the groceries in from the car,” and he says, “As soon as I get to the next level,” that’s not obedience. Now, we don’t believe that a child…
Understanding Obedience
• • • • • Parenting Tip January 4, 2013 Understanding Obedience We live in a society where an emphasis on teaching obedience sounds to some like heavy-handed authoritarianism. Parents don’t want to be dictators so they sometimes move far away from anything that looks like being controlling. This is unfortunate since God is the one who gave the instructions for children to learn obedience. Hidden within this quality are the principles that will make children successful as they get…
The Stop Rule
• • • • • Parenting Tip December 29, 2012 The Stop Rule Teasing and playing around can be amusing, but usually one person wants to stop before the other. Angry words and tears often bring an end to what started out as fun. Incorporating a “Stop Rule” in your family will help children, and parents too for that matter, know when to quit. The Stop Rule is simply this: When a child wants to be done with…
A Time to Practice Saying Thank You
• • • • • Parenting Tip December 22, 2012 A Time to Practice Saying Thank You Gratefulness is an important life quality because it helps us to be thankful for what we have instead of complaining about what we don’t have. Gratefulness is a lifestyle but it starts by saying “Thank you” to others who bless us. Begin now to prepare your children for receiving gifts. Talk about the importance of the giver, not just the gift. Teach children…